i eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast

It was spring of 2003 we were in the city at this bar called Swift's which is always full of young drunk Irish folk and is usually fairly entertaining.

My friend noticed Shooter McGavin in the corner of the bar talking to some guy in a really ugly sports coat. When this friend sees someone even mildly famous, he turns into a pile of giggling retard mush.

He came running up to me with his hands shaking wildly like he had just been electrocuted, he is stuttering and giggling like a school girl. "thash wush sha sha shoota mcgaving bak dere, sha shooter".

(One thing I have to mention about myself, when in the same room with any star even mildly famous I try to either freak them out or make them laugh. A combination of the two is a plus.)

I have scared Jimmy Falon on several occasions, once with his parents. I told Christopher Meloni that he had body odor and I made out with Evan Dando on a plane, later becoming president of the "I Am The Only Person Who Stalks Evan Dando or Even Knows Who He Is" Fan Club.

I approached Shooter with two shots. He turned out to be pretty cool, he took the the shot I offered and we chatted for a few minutes.

Soon I felt the conversation slipping so I began to dance around kicking my heels up and making tiny gun shooting motions with my fingers, screaming "HEY SHOOTER LOOK AT ME. YEEYYYYYYYY. I SHOOT. YEYY. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ME NOW. YEEYYYYYYYYY".

To which Shooter replied "I think you are a big drunk retard".

This isnt me but it could be.